What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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