he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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