Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
