Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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