We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I would ride that face into the sunset
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
