Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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