Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
