the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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