i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Randomize
