I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
