It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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