this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
How external is "for external use only"?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
