new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
