I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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