i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i came on her dog
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
