...so i touched it.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Randomize