Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
