Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
