Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
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