I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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