So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
