At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
