this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
