She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You smell like stripper and shame
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
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