Sponge bath it is.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
