i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
