oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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