He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Why did my mother make you get naked?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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