The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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