so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
