If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
