I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize