youre lurking in front of me
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize