I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He uses pillows to masturbate.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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