i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize