We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
