So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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