just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
im holly from the hills drunk
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Actions speak louder than pants.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize