sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
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