Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
