Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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