the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
