Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
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