10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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