i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
