when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
