They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
