butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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