Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I would fuck him just for his dog
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
