Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
